Tips on dating jewish men
It is my job as a Jew to live life to the fullest in all ways and I take that responsibility very seriously, man. It's this loyalty that makes me an incredible friend and an incredibly solid partner. Maybe it's the fact I've had someone call me something terrible because of my religion in the past or maybe it is just what I've been taught from a young age, but when I have my people, I'm with them for good.Tu B’Av, the Jewish holiday of love is here, and that means you have to find your special somebody. In the old days, you would turn to the local matchmaker. In order to meet you special somebody online, you have to start with a profile. And I am going to coach you on the basics of making your profile presentable, so you can meet a good Jew. It makes you look mysterious, and thus more attractive. This is based on the extensive research that I have done of dating sites, looking at every Jewish girls profile, not talking to any of them but still looking for my life partner. Have a streimel in the background, sport a prayer shawl, kiss a mezuzah, eat a deli sandwich, hold Shabbos candles and wear a head covering. Nobody wants to see you wearing a shirt that says “Cohen family Passover Pananza in Disney World.” It was funny to your family. People reading it will be thinking, “This guy is so mysterious, he knows nothing about himself.” If writing about yourself, make it clear that you know you’re the greatest. Jewish food is delicious when done right and, again, by "right" I mean exactly the way it was prepared for me each holiday growing up.
This will attract the right partner and weed out all people who are not attracted to people who behave like eighty-year old Jews. For many years, my profile had the picture of the Rock. But as I later learned, it was too much of a letdown when they showed up to the date. Don’t put up your picture from the eighth-grade yearbook.
Then I had a phase when I wanted to look more religious, so I posted an old picture of the Rambam with a turban. Nobody needs to see that Rachel wants you to have a great summer.
Now I just use pictures of myself with the blurring effect. The thinking fist pose is a classic if you are Greek.
They will forget about your picture, your religious affiliation, your huge ego, and the fact you cheat when you play war with kids. Kilimnick’s universal humor takes you on a “tour of funny” through the Holy Land.
Again, if you are a guy, safest to say, “Beautiful Shabbos table.” That is all you have to say. In his one-man Stand-up shows dedicated to the Olim (the creator and performer of The Aliyah Monologues, Find Me A Wife, Uncle 'D', Frum From Birth (Religiouos Manifesto and more), the rabbi turned comedian brings you on the emotional journey of the immigrant.