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Socially, they are expected to be "compliant" (i.e. However, they are also urged by women's sexual interest to maintain an "attractive personality" (i.e. Unfortunately, men sometimes report that attempting to balance these notions does not result in satisfaction, happiness, or women's appreciation and respect.
The men that I speak with (and who commented on my last post) lament about being in a "no win situation" in modern dating.
So, until a new equilibrium is reached in these evolving social norms, men have difficult choices to make.
Essentially, they seem to have to either appease social norms (for relationships and acceptance) or evolved standards of attractiveness (and get sexual fulfillment).
In contrast, if they follow more "assertive" biological imperatives, they are labeled "jerks" and "players"—who may get sexual gratification, but not love or respect from what they would consider a "good woman".Changing social norms has allowed few avenues by which they can be both acceptable as a relationship partner and attractive as a sex partner.As a result, at least half of their needs are unfulfilled, regardless of the decision they make.Men often define these women along evolutionary psychology lines—women who are sexually-selective, faithful, physically attractive, and have a pleasant, respectful disposition (for more on these qualities, see Buss, 2003 and my own articles here and here).Unfortunately, these qualities are again part of women's double bind, with social norms sometimes guiding them away from these biologically feminine characteristics.